Comments on: openly apostate church goer? http://www.the-exponent.com/2009/03/20/openly-apostate-church-goer/ Am I Not a Woman and a Sister? Sat, 31 Jul 2010 22:13:40 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.0 By: hainesak http://www.the-exponent.com/2009/03/20/openly-apostate-church-goer/comment-page-2/#comment-10847 hainesak Fri, 18 Sep 2009 09:13:37 +0000 http://the-exponent.com/?p=2125#comment-10847 this is from a guy's perspective. for a couple of years i struggled with alot of the teaching of the church and christianity in general. my belief in god or any sort of higher power was nonexistent. i saw no logic at all in christian theology and didn't even believe in life after death. i am fairly well read, having read everything from the encyclopedia of mormonism to the illustrated book of mormon. i've always been a thinker (perhaps not an understanderer) but i like to think. alot of the teachings of the church stopped making sense to me, things seemed monotonous at church, i got bored, and i stopped believing. the only reason i went to church when i went was for my wife and children. great example of a priesthood holder, huh? when we were first married and dating, we talked about the gospel all the time; everything from the bible to conference talks. i don't know what happened. i know it wasn't overnight, but i just stopped buying what was being sold. it's taken years for me to come to terms with myself, my relationship with Christ, and find peace and reconcilliation with the church. i didn't have a single epiphany that led me back. it's been a long and rocky road and difficult for my wife who has the ability to accept things on faith that i require evidence and proof of. i've had to come to terms with the fact that God exists, that he is aware of my struggles, and He knows more than i do and there are some things that i just cannot know. i had to start at square one with prayer. i just remember praying and praying and praying and then praying some more and trying to understand if i was feeling what i was feeling because i wanted to feel it or expected it, or if it was from above. doctrine and convenants section 9 has been crucial in me finding some semblance of peace in my life again. pray during boring lessons. pray during sacrament. pray in the toilet while hiding from members or skipping classes. i just had to pray. the great irony as i look back is that when i started to have doubts and fell out of belief, it all started about when i stopped praying. i had to pray to find out if God existed. i had to pray to find out if i should be going to church, if the bible is true as well as the book of mormon. i had to pray to find out if my marriage was truly valid. i prayed to find out if the leadership of the church was under His direction. i prayed to know if there was more to life than what i was experiencing. i especially had to pray to find out about life after death and the true nature of families. it was a struggle that took years. am i totally cured of doubts and questions? no. am i at peace? yes. do i believe that satan was rejocing in my disbelief? abso-freeking-lutely. i felt physical as well as spiritual resistance on my road back. it has truly sucked at times. the comfort and peace i feel now though is awesome. god bless and good luck. this is from a guy’s perspective. for a couple of years i struggled with alot of the teaching of the church and christianity in general. my belief in god or any sort of higher power was nonexistent. i saw no logic at all in christian theology and didn’t even believe in life after death. i am fairly well read, having read everything from the encyclopedia of mormonism to the illustrated book of mormon. i’ve always been a thinker (perhaps not an understanderer) but i like to think. alot of the teachings of the church stopped making sense to me, things seemed monotonous at church, i got bored, and i stopped believing.
the only reason i went to church when i went was for my wife and children. great example of a priesthood holder, huh? when we were first married and dating, we talked about the gospel all the time; everything from the bible to conference talks. i don’t know what happened. i know it wasn’t overnight, but i just stopped buying what was being sold.
it’s taken years for me to come to terms with myself, my relationship with Christ, and find peace and reconcilliation with the church.
i didn’t have a single epiphany that led me back. it’s been a long and rocky road and difficult for my wife who has the ability to accept things on faith that i require evidence and proof of. i’ve had to come to terms with the fact that God exists, that he is aware of my struggles, and He knows more than i do and there are some things that i just cannot know. i had to start at square one with prayer. i just remember praying and praying and praying and then praying some more and trying to understand if i was feeling what i was feeling because i wanted to feel it or expected it, or if it was from above.
doctrine and convenants section 9 has been crucial in me finding some semblance of peace in my life again.
pray during boring lessons. pray during sacrament. pray in the toilet while hiding from members or skipping classes. i just had to pray. the great irony as i look back is that when i started to have doubts and fell out of belief, it all started about when i stopped praying. i had to pray to find out if God existed. i had to pray to find out if i should be going to church, if the bible is true as well as the book of mormon. i had to pray to find out if my marriage was truly valid. i prayed to find out if the leadership of the church was under His direction. i prayed to know if there was more to life than what i was experiencing. i especially had to pray to find out about life after death and the true nature of families. it was a struggle that took years.
am i totally cured of doubts and questions? no. am i at peace? yes. do i believe that satan was rejocing in my disbelief? abso-freeking-lutely. i felt physical as well as spiritual resistance on my road back. it has truly sucked at times. the comfort and peace i feel now though is awesome.
god bless and good luck.

]]> By: Kathy http://www.the-exponent.com/2009/03/20/openly-apostate-church-goer/comment-page-2/#comment-10846 Kathy Thu, 17 Sep 2009 04:07:23 +0000 http://the-exponent.com/?p=2125#comment-10846 I have a question for those of you who have had doubts about the church and even, perhaps, have left it. Many of you seem to have very understanding and supportive husbands. Has anyone had other experiences? Husbands that are hurt, angry, or remove themselves emotionally? I am on the very beginnings of a new spiritual quest(after 20 years in the church) and it has been a bumpy road so far. I have a question for those of you who have had doubts about the church and even, perhaps, have left it. Many of you seem to have very understanding and supportive husbands. Has anyone had other experiences? Husbands that are hurt, angry, or remove themselves emotionally? I am on the very beginnings of a new spiritual quest(after 20 years in the church) and it has been a bumpy road so far.

]]> By: Eleanor J. http://www.the-exponent.com/2009/03/20/openly-apostate-church-goer/comment-page-2/#comment-10845 Eleanor J. Mon, 14 Sep 2009 04:08:19 +0000 http://the-exponent.com/?p=2125#comment-10845 Interesting article and comments. I'm a fourth generation member and am in my 60's now. I've always remained faithful to gospel principles. I don't always want to go to church; I sometimes find it boring and a waste of time. However, whenever I feel that way I always come back to the question: "What is it that I'm not doing?". And know that sometimes this sounds trite, but it's true because I've proven it time and time again. I'm I being faithful in reading and searching the scriptures and saying my prayers. And usually I'm not, so back on the bandwagon I get, and all is well with the world - again. Sometimes we get in the way of our own progression within the church. My philosophy is to serve and sit back and enjoy the ride. Interesting article and comments. I’m a fourth generation member and am in my 60′s now. I’ve always remained faithful to gospel principles. I don’t always want to go to church; I sometimes find it boring and a waste of time. However, whenever I feel that way I always come back to the question: “What is it that I’m not doing?”. And know that sometimes this sounds trite, but it’s true because I’ve proven it time and time again. I’m I being faithful in reading and searching the scriptures and saying my prayers. And usually I’m not, so back on the bandwagon I get, and all is well with the world – again. Sometimes we get in the way of our own progression within the church. My philosophy is to serve and sit back and enjoy the ride.

]]> By: LDSBeliever http://www.the-exponent.com/2009/03/20/openly-apostate-church-goer/comment-page-2/#comment-10844 LDSBeliever Sun, 13 Sep 2009 17:37:34 +0000 http://the-exponent.com/?p=2125#comment-10844 G. If any of ye lack wisdom, let him ask of God. James 1:5. My dad once told me that you could ask 10 people a question about religion and you would get 10 different answers. If you want the right answer for you, ask God. Good luck. G. If any of ye lack wisdom, let him ask of God. James 1:5. My dad once told me that you could ask 10 people a question about religion and you would get 10 different answers. If you want the right answer for you, ask God. Good luck.

]]> By: Laura http://www.the-exponent.com/2009/03/20/openly-apostate-church-goer/comment-page-2/#comment-10843 Laura Sun, 28 Jun 2009 22:14:20 +0000 http://the-exponent.com/?p=2125#comment-10843 I was a convert when I married my husband (Member) and attended church, was sealed and currently hold a reccommend. I am struggling with going to church as well. I was always skeptical, but have learned much about the church that I can not tolerate. I don't want to lose my connection with my Husband and children as well, but we have to be true to ourselves. I wish we could just go to church without being harrassed by the members. I was a convert when I married my husband (Member) and attended church, was sealed and currently hold a reccommend. I am struggling with going to church as well. I was always skeptical, but have learned much about the church that I can not tolerate. I don’t want to lose my connection with my Husband and children as well, but we have to be true to ourselves. I wish we could just go to church without being harrassed by the members.

]]> By: Alex http://www.the-exponent.com/2009/03/20/openly-apostate-church-goer/comment-page-2/#comment-10842 Alex Mon, 20 Apr 2009 03:38:26 +0000 http://the-exponent.com/?p=2125#comment-10842 I noticed that you said that you didn't believe that there was any difference between the LDS and other churches...so would you be willing to give other churches a try? I believe that it is the Holy Spirit of the Living God and a relationship with him that makes it worth going to church. The church is not perfect and is filled with imperfect people, and that is why we need a perfect Savior, who came and showed us the way and is still living and active today to restore live, and to give them purpose and meaning. I pray that you are directly visited by him in some way, be it through something said by a pastor, a friend, His word (which he promises will not return void, or in visions and dreams) May his presence bring your peace, hope, and purpose in this life! I noticed that you said that you didn’t believe that there was any difference between the LDS and other churches…so would you be willing to give other churches a try? I believe that it is the Holy Spirit of the Living God and a relationship with him that makes it worth going to church. The church is not perfect and is filled with imperfect people, and that is why we need a perfect Savior, who came and showed us the way and is still living and active today to restore live, and to give them purpose and meaning. I pray that you are directly visited by him in some way, be it through something said by a pastor, a friend, His word (which he promises will not return void, or in visions and dreams) May his presence bring your peace, hope, and purpose in this life!

]]> By: G http://www.the-exponent.com/2009/03/20/openly-apostate-church-goer/comment-page-2/#comment-10841 G Fri, 17 Apr 2009 16:38:54 +0000 http://the-exponent.com/?p=2125#comment-10841 thanks for the suggestion brenda (i always love a good tip on a book), I've added it to my stack of "to read" books. thanks for the suggestion brenda (i always love a good tip on a book), I’ve added it to my stack of “to read” books.

]]> By: body and blood and tears in church « The Exponent http://www.the-exponent.com/2009/03/20/openly-apostate-church-goer/comment-page-2/#comment-10840 body and blood and tears in church « The Exponent Fri, 17 Apr 2009 16:33:05 +0000 http://the-exponent.com/?p=2125#comment-10840 [...] I have begun attending the lds church again but refrain from partaking of the sacrament.    Also I plan is to continue visiting other [...] [...] I have begun attending the lds church again but refrain from partaking of the sacrament.    Also I plan is to continue visiting other [...]

]]> By: Brenda http://www.the-exponent.com/2009/03/20/openly-apostate-church-goer/comment-page-2/#comment-10839 Brenda Fri, 17 Apr 2009 12:52:19 +0000 http://the-exponent.com/?p=2125#comment-10839 You know, I order a lot of religious books searching for answers to questions that I have about the church. I like to read others ideas which help me form my own. None of the books I've bought have really contained what I was looking for until I bought Shaken Faith Syndrome by Michael R. Ash. I actually bought it for a family member and thought I'd read it first to see if it contained anything good. This book has completely changed me and how I view the church. I have peace about a lot of things I didn't before and now I've been able to move past that and really start finding answers on my own that I've never been able to see before. I don't even think the book answer the questions I had directly but maybe the ones I didn't know I had. I hesitate to summarize the book b/c I don't think I could do it justice, but I've been recommending it to others I know who have questions. I'm in no way affiliated with the writer or anything, I'm just really excited about how it's helped me and what I've been able to see and discover since reading it!! If you get a chance to read it, I'd love to know what you think!! You know, I order a lot of religious books searching for answers to questions that I have about the church. I like to read others ideas which help me form my own. None of the books I’ve bought have really contained what I was looking for until I bought Shaken Faith Syndrome by Michael R. Ash. I actually bought it for a family member and thought I’d read it first to see if it contained anything good. This book has completely changed me and how I view the church. I have peace about a lot of things I didn’t before and now I’ve been able to move past that and really start finding answers on my own that I’ve never been able to see before. I don’t even think the book answer the questions I had directly but maybe the ones I didn’t know I had. I hesitate to summarize the book b/c I don’t think I could do it justice, but I’ve been recommending it to others I know who have questions. I’m in no way affiliated with the writer or anything, I’m just really excited about how it’s helped me and what I’ve been able to see and discover since reading it!! If you get a chance to read it, I’d love to know what you think!!

]]> By: G http://www.the-exponent.com/2009/03/20/openly-apostate-church-goer/comment-page-2/#comment-10838 G Sun, 12 Apr 2009 07:51:12 +0000 http://the-exponent.com/?p=2125#comment-10838 rebekah- good questions. I wish I had more answers but I am still working it out myself as I go along. Plus I think the answer is unique for each situation. I wish you the best on your journey. As per husbands and saving face and intentions, there is really something about that: I do think there exists a bit of an implied shame for the good priesthood leader of the home if he is unable to keep his wife from losing her testimony. (my cynical mind wants to insert here the phrase "keep her in line.") And yes, I do believe that my own beloved has struggled a bit with the idea that our friends and extended family think less of him somehow because of my "apostasy". He has dealt with it well, but is it obviously a force to be reckoned with. Again, I wish you the best of luck. rebekah- good questions. I wish I had more answers but I am still working it out myself as I go along.

Plus I think the answer is unique for each situation. I wish you the best on your journey.

As per husbands and saving face and intentions, there is really something about that: I do think there exists a bit of an implied shame for the good priesthood leader of the home if he is unable to keep his wife from losing her testimony. (my cynical mind wants to insert here the phrase “keep her in line.”)

And yes, I do believe that my own beloved has struggled a bit with the idea that our friends and extended family think less of him somehow because of my “apostasy”.

He has dealt with it well, but is it obviously a force to be reckoned with.

Again, I wish you the best of luck.

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