by ‘Kelly Ann’

This coming weekend, I will be singing Gounod’s:: Messe Solennelle (St.Cecilia Mass) in a joint performance of the local symphony and the Unitarian Universalist Choir.  I quite randomly, after attending one service at the UU church, started singing with the choir near my house at the beginning of February.  They don’t care that I am not a member of their church – nor that I am Mormon.

While I originally went to see what their music program was like, thinking it would be nice to learn a few hymns, I was drawn in by the spirit of the group and range of music that they sing.   In the two and a half months since I joined the choir, we have sung some hymns – but also a mix of Broadway, Jazz, and Classical pieces.  I have felt at ease as I have gotten to know an interesting mix of people who made me feel comfortable from the beginning.  My section in particular has gone out of its way in encouraging me.

Having only sung in ward and stake choirs sporadically previously, and suffered a bit from a shy alto complex, singing in the UU choir has pushed me musically.  The choir is actually pretty good with an enthusiastic musical director and professional singers as section leaders.  It is really fulfilling just to learn new pieces and sing for 2-3 hours a week.  However, being in the UU church has also fed me spiritually in ways that I did not know I was lacking.  I can’t tell you how many times I have felt the spirit while singing pieces or interacting with others.  It has been refreshing to feel welcome to a group where faith is integral to their existence, but people’s beliefs vary from Atheist to Theist to “former whatever” to “dual whatever” to simply a musician.  I now come early to chat with friends I have made on Thursday nights and on some Sundays.  I have been gaining new perspectives on lives and faith while being myself.  I’ve even had some particularly interesting conversations about Mormon Feminism and Women’s Ordination with a couple women who attended the Sunstone West dialogue between Catholic and Mormon women (they identifying as Catholic as well as Unitarian Universalist).  While there are definitely moments like when I have sung completely different words to hymns, that I have felt a bit odd thinking about the fact that I am singing with another church’s choir, overall it has been really satisfying.

As I am proud of how I have progressed as a singer, and am really looking forward to the performance this weekend, I have invited a handful of friends – albeit my voice will be hidden within my section and I may not be able to see everybody who comes.  I have to say that I have been pleased that my Mormon friends haven’t been put off by the fact that it is in the UU Church – which I worried a little bit about.  They recognize the importance to me, enjoy music themselves, and where possible are coming to support me.  For which I am grateful.

In terms of discussion, I am curious what if any ways, have you participated with different faiths or religious traditions?  Was it a good experience or bad experience?

Today in General Conference. I’m writing this before Conference starts in my time zone, so I don’t know what is happening.

I was involved with Let Women Pray from the beginning, and now we are at and end. We asked that women pray in this General Conference. So what happened, and more importantly, how do you feel about it?

I can guess at my own reactions. If a woman prays in Conference, I will be pleasantly surprised. I will feel proud of my role in Let Women Pray and what we had a hand in accomplishing. I will be proud of the church for including women for listening to the concerns and feelings of some of its members, and for not balking at listening to public opinion.

If a woman doesn’t pray, I will not be surprised. I will be proud of my role in Let Women Pray and of the members who expressed themselves to their leaders. I will be disappointed that the church did not make a simple change to help some of its members feel loved and included and feel the missed an opportunity to show that they care about how members feel.

How do you feel?

Guest post by Bethany

Bethany is a community activist in Richmond, Virginia, focusing on creating a healthy food culture in public schools.  In her spare time she works to create a healthier gender culture at church.  She’s finding that getting adult Mormons to say “Heavenly Parents” is a lot harder than getting kids to eat kale.  She mothers three young girls, loves to cycle with her husband, and digs cooking spicy vegetarian food to share with neighbors. 

I don’t know anyone who anticipates the unveiling of the General Primary theme for Sharing Time for the year.  I know I certainly never have.  This year, I happened to stumble upon it and was pleasantly surprised.  No, I was more than surprised. Elated–that’s a better description.  Have any of you seen it?  It certainly doesn’t get a lot of coverage.  I mean, who even thinks about the Sharing Time theme until early October when you’re trying to help your child memorize her part for the Primary sacrament meeting?  Well this year, I suggest we start thinking about it earlier, because it contains a gem.

For 2013, Primary children throughout the world will be celebrating the theme I Am a Child of God.  But the theme doesn’t stop with that typical Mormon mantra…it continues on with a phrase from the Proclamation on the Family, ““All human beings—male and female—are created in the image of God. Each is a beloved spirit son or daughter of heavenly parents”.  Did you catch that?  Heavenly Parents in the Primary theme?  Is it just me, or is that pretty remarkable?  I mean women in the Relief Society are studying Lorenzo Snow, but the kiddos in Primary get to focus on Heavenly Parents…I know where I want to hang out on Sundays.  But whether you’re serving in Primary or not, I think this is something all Mormon Feminists should jump on.

To me, the theme gently opens up the door to speak about our Heavenly Parents and/or Heavenly Mother whenever we feel inspired to do so…in sharing time, in Primary lessons, in talks, in fast and testimony meetings. So let’s raise our hands in Sharing Time and declare that Heavenly Mother was certainly involved in creating everything that is lovely in our world.  Let’s ask the Primary chorister if we can use the term Heavenly Parents as we sing some of our songs.  Let’s show the I am a daughter of God Mormon Message video in our classes and discuss specific qualities we have inherited from our Heavenly Mother.  And let’s initiate conversations with our ward and stake Primary presidencies on how to fully take advantage of this inspired theme.  Surely our children need to hear more about our Heavenly Parents…there is no better way for them to understand the importance of marriage and families and the ideal of equal partnership.  If we let this unique theme go by unnoticed, it will be a tragically missed opportunity.

Earlier this month, I bore my testimony in sacrament meeting about the Primary theme and how awesome it is that the restored gospel enables me to teach the 10 and 11 year old Valiant girls in our ward that they have a Heavenly Mother, that they have a divine role model and an example of their infinite potential.  It’s powerful stuff.  And my testimony was even well received by my rather conservative ward.  So go for it!…let’s get Heavenly Mother out of the Primary closet and into our Sabbath conversations and beyond.  If anyone gives you any trouble, just refer them to President Wixom, the General Primary President.

Is the LDS church compatible with everyone’s temperament, or does it cater to certain kinds of personalities?

I’m currently reading Quiet: the Power of Introverts in a World that Can’t Stop Talking by Susan Cain. As an introvert, it has been an interesting and helpful read. It discusses what makes introverts unique and successful, and how we function in a world that tends to cater to extroverts. One of the questions the books poses is: how does religion cater to introverts and extroverts. I’m running off a definition of introverts drawing energy from being alone, preferring to work independently, and feeling uncomfortable with crowds and people they don’t know and extroverts drawing energy from others, preferring to work in groups and enjoying spending time with and meeting new people. Because introversion and extroversion are only one aspect of our personalities, we can’t say that church is good or bad for all introverts or extroverts. But I think it is an interesting discussion to have; how does the church cater to introverts and extroverts?

Just because I’m curious, what’s your favorite source of caffeine?  Or do you drink it at all?  My favorite is Coke Zero, which I’m not proud to admit I drink in greater volume than water some days.  I gave it up for Lent last year, and it was hard. Every. single. day.  I tried it again this year and after one day I couldn’t remember how I benefitted from doing  it last time, other than proving it to myself that I could.  So I thought well, I climbed that mountain and once was enough.  And bought myself a Coke.

I love the opening quote of this lesson. “Do not expect to become perfect at once. If you do, you will be disappointed. Be better today than you were yesterday, and be better tomorrow than you are today.” Too often we get bogged down in not being perfect right now, and feel guilty for not being good enough. The lesson itself acknowledge this at the end when it says “President Snow acknowledged that the command to be perfect causes concern for some Latter-day Saints. As you study this chapter, look for counsel that might comfort someone who is troubled by the command to be perfect.” I would love it if this lesson focused on making people feel good about their progress and hopeful for success. So here is what I find comforting; I hope some of it is useful to others.

What Does Perfect Mean?