Daughters in My Kingdom: “Live Up to Your Privilege” (Chapter 10)

After the previous nine chapters discuss themes throughout the history of the Relief Society, this concluding chapter is the call to add yourself to that history. This chapter is full of great quotes and it would be very easy to pick your favorites, read them, and then discuss them, which is what I’ll do here.

Daughters of God

This section has a quote from M. Russell Ballard that I really like. As an opening activity, I would have this written up on a board and ask the class to pick out traits listed in it and circle them or list them on the side. I highlighted some of them here:

“We believe in and are counting on your goodness and your strength, your propensity for virtue and valor, your kindness and courage, your strength and resilience. We believe in your mission as women of God. … We believe that the Church simply will not accomplish what it must without your faith and faithfulness, your innate tendency to put the well-being of others ahead of your own, and your spiritual strength and tenacity. And we believe that God’s plan is for you to become queens and to receive the highest blessings any woman can receive in time or eternity.”

I think it is interesting to note that the most-used word is strength.

When I was growing up, one of my Young Women’s leaders moved away. One of her last Sundays at church was a Fast Sunday and one of her non-member neighbors came to church with her. This neighbor went up to the pulpit and talked about the service that my YW leader had done for her and said, “When I look at her, I see Christ. She looks like Christ to me.” I think that is probably one of the highest compliments I’ve ever heard. These traits highlighted above are all Christlike traits. And not only are we like Christ, because we take on Christ’s name at baptism, we walk every day as if we are Christ himself and can be saviors for others and ourselves. When I went to the Relief Society minutes where the quote from this chapter is found, the minutes note that Joseph Smith stated, “It is an honor to save yourselves.”

True Charity, a Legacy Passed from Heart to Heart

In this section, I like Elder Eyring’s quote,

I will speak to you … of the great legacy those who went before you in the Relief Society have passed on to you. The part … which seems to me most important and persistent is that charity is at the heart of the society and is to come into the heart, to be part of the very nature, of every member. Charity meant to them far more than a feeling of benevolence. Charity is born of faith in the Lord Jesus Christ and is an effect of His Atonement working in the hearts of the members. …

The sentence “Charity meant to them far more than a feeling of benevolence” struck me. I would even say it’s more than filling out a tithing slip or making dinner for someone. After the last section and thinking about how we are like Christ, I think that charity asks us to see Christ in the people around us. The chapter tells some stories of charity demonstrated in the lives of the women in a family, but I think it would be neat to have a story of your own to share or have the group share their own stories.

My Turn to Serve

What I like about this next section is the stories of service relating to death. Now, I’ll be the first one to say that I get worn down by the third, fourth, fifth, etc. dying child story in a single conference weekend. Talking about death can be draining and sometimes feels emotionally manipulative. But I liked the emphasis on the service rendered during the time of death. I think that because it can be difficult in our culture to discuss death and grief, having examples of appreciated service can be helpful for when we find the people around us, or ourselves, in mourning. This is really where we can “mourn with those that mourn” and the Relief Society can really live up to its name. Again, personal stories are great for this, but it’s sometimes nice to have the stories from the manual if it’s too hard to share personal stories about grief.

“Lead the World… in Everything that is Praiseworthy”

This is the rally cry and ultimate urging of this book: band together, pick up your tools, and be amazing. The heading for this section is not passive and is not timid, and neither should we be. What I really like is the phrase “everything that is praiseworthy.” If you think about all the things that are praiseworthy… well, it’s a lot of things! Art, science, performance, parenting, mediating, etc. I can’t think of too many non-criminal activities that aren’t praiseworthy. So take charge and live the best you can.

At this point, I think I would ask the class if they can identify what is keeping them back from doing something “praiseworthy” that they’ve always wanted to do and if it’s possible to remove that. That can provide a lot of discussion.

For me, the biggest hinderance to this is feeling like it’s too late, that I should have done all those praiseworthy things earlier. I’d write off things, “I can’t become a great pianist- I didn’t start lessons at 5!” or “I’d never be able to contribute anything to my field of study- only young people in college do that.” However, earlier in this chapter, the phrase, “potential as holy women” is used, and when I think of a “holy woman” I imagine a wizened and thoughtful older woman. There is still time!

I also get held back if I worry that I won’t succeed or if I can’t give the time needed for success. But even a little bit is a success.

In preparing for this lesson, I listened to the TED talk Unlock the intelligence, passion, and greatness of girls by Leymah Gbowee, peace and women’s rights activist and Nobel laureate. Trigger warning: rape, incest.

In watching her tell her story, I was impressed by what she and the girls and women she talked about were able to accomplish in such a short time. Gbowee got involved in activism in 1998 and was awarded the Nobel Peace Prize in 2011. She admits that she wasn’t saving the girls asking to be saved at the beginning. While a listener might say, “Just take that little girl in!” And maybe it wasn’t the best choice, but maybe it was. Our lives don’t have to be perfect to make things better. I also think of the character Scrooge in A Christmas Carol. His change of heart was near the end of his life and that’s ok, too. Or if you’d like a non-fictional character, there are plenty of scripture stories like Saul/Paul in the New Testament, or the woman caught in adultery: “Go and sin no more.”

I think the biggest concern with discussing this chapter is feeling like we have to do it all and immediately. Sometimes “leading in all that is praiseworthy” requires a nap or a break. And knowing your limits is praiseworthy, too.

The chapter finishes with a reminder that,

“The charge to lead out in everything that is praiseworthy, Godlike, uplifting, and purifying is a demanding one. It always has been. But individual Relief Society sisters are not alone in accepting this charge. They are part of a great organization, founded by priesthood authority and strengthened by the teachings and declarations of prophets.”

One of my favorite aspects of Mormonism is the idea of Zion and that we are all working for that, and we are all working together. We believe that Zion has happened on earth at least a couple of times (Enoch’s city, the Book of Mormon peoples post-Christ’s visit), and so it gives us hope that we can again create it. It’s hard, but not impossible and let’s get to it!

What questions/thoughts would you like to add? Also, a Happy Relief Society anniversary to all today!

 

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Moderation in All Things

I side 93% with Barack Obama

I have seen this quiz pop up all over my facebook wall recently. It’s pretty straight forward, you answer a series of questions about your opinions on “political” issues and it comes back with what politician you agree with most. I decided to take this quiz a couple days ago when writing another word of my thesis about domestic violence seemed completely overwhelming. I was not incredibly surprised by the results–as you can see in the image I side with Barack Obama about 93% of the time. I am a liberal through and through (in fact, the times I did not agree with Obama it was because my answers were more progressive than his).

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Feeding the Multitude

Feeding the Multitude

Feeding of the Multitude, Duc de Berry

This past fall, our stake president introduced me to a new way to look at the miracles of Jesus feeding the multitude, which I wanted to share here. The feeding of the multitude is the only miracle that is mentioned in all four gospels, and in Matthew and Mark, there are multiple versions of the miracle. It has obviously touched the hearts of the early Christians for it to be recorded so often, and is dear to us today.

To feed thousands of people to the point of being full with only a few loaves and fish is huge and with baskets of leftovers is huge. To try to figure out how you’d have to physically do that (would you re-arrange the molecules? beam extra loaves in from a hidden teleportation device?) is mind boggling. We don’t know. My stake president offered another idea.

Who was in the multitude? Probably a range of people of different socioeconomic status, families, tribes of Israel. Perhaps there were people in the crowd who had brought some extra food in their own bags. Perhaps, when the basket came around, they saw that the crowd was huge and they had a little extra, and maybe moved by the compassion and healing miracles they saw Christ demonstrate or the teachings of love and charity they heard, or the example of Christ’s examples in giving all their own bread and fish, they took from their own bags and placed their extra into the baskets.

And thousands of people were fed. And there was plenty left over.

I don’t believe that this version makes the miracle of feeding the multitudes less miraculous. It is a miracle to have power over the physical world, but I think it may be even more of a miracle to have the power to change the hearts of human beings.

Do we have extra in our bags that we can put into the baskets and share with our community? Does Christ inspire us to action?

“Then those men, when they had seen the miracle that Jesus did, said, This is of a truth that prophet that should come into the world.” John 6:14

This Christmas, as we celebrate the man who changed the hearts of millions of people, let’s remember to let him change ours as well.

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Exponent II Winter 2011 Issue Now Online

The latest issue of Exponent II is available online and copies will be mailed out next week.  Make sure to put your order in (subscription or individual copy) by December 11th to get this issue and enjoy this letter from our new president, Kirsten Campbell.

I am a quilter.

Ten years ago, Pandora Brewer, an Exponent II sister, introduced me to the art of quilting and my life changed forever. I had always had an enthusiasm for fabric—I liked to make my own clothes and Halloween costumes for my kids. But, quilting was different. It awakened a part of my soul that has brought me more fulfillment and harmony than any other occupation or hobby.

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Reverence is More Than Just Quietly Sitting

Reverence is More Than Just Quietly Sitting

Last Sunday I found myself sitting in the back row of a south Oakland black gospel church. I had been asked to speak at their community education event in relation to some of my volunteer work, but I was a little early and came in 5 minutes before one of their services was finished. The pastor led the couple dozen parishioners in riveting song. When little girls from outside peeked in, he called out, “God bless you child!” Meanwhile the little girls in the pews jumped up and down with the organ music. We were all told to raise our right hand and ask for the healing of the Lord. Trying to blend in, because, you know, being the only white person was pretty darn inconspicuous, I followed along and observed the women close their eyes and pray out loud. “Amen, Lord, Amen!”

The woman I was meeting there was late and apologized citing the traffic. She was coming from Antioch, 45 minutes away. I commented, “This must be a really great church if you come here from all the way out there,” and I helped her put together some things for the night’s event.

A different pastor was in charge, or using Mormon terms, you could say presiding, over the educational event. He introduced the prayer by Mother Gardner. Her prayer started off like most prayers I’ve heard before: an invocation to God, asking for guidance and love and healing. Then the organist joined in and her prayer and the music came together, raising the spirits of the congregation. Many more shouts of “Amen, Lord!” and “Thank you, Lord!” went up into the air. A teenage girl, Naja, gave the scriptures, Jeremiah 17:14, “Heal me, O Lord, and I shall be healed; save me, and I shall be saved: for thou art my praise,” and 3 John 1:2, “Beloved, I wish above all things that thou mayest prosper and be in health, even as thy soul prospereth.”

Pastor Wheeler and Organist

This is where it got exciting. Pastor Wheeler led the group in song- and boy, was it a song! I didn’t know it, but it was easy to follow along as it was pretty repetitive. I envied the organist’s improv abilities and the drummer made it very exciting. I remember looking around thinking, “There hasn’t been a quiet moment all evening and yet look at these people feeling the Spirit! I bet a person can go through life without ever needing to be ‘reverent’ and still feel a close connection with God.” I couldn’t help but smile and pray that my ears would stop ringing before it was my turn to speak.

The woman who organized the night could tell I was a fish out of water so when she stood up as master of ceremonies, she reminded the group that we could use our bodies and voices as much as we felt moved to.

When it was my turn to talk, the pastor and congregation interjected a few “AMENs!” between my sentences. There’s nothing quite so validating as people amen-ing your words. It was exciting to speak to this group and I hope I get another opportunity in the future.

Unfortunately, I had to leave early, so I didn’t get to listen to the rest of the speakers or participate in the Praise Dance on the program. They walked me out to my car and we said our goodbyes. I drove home listening to a great podcast, feeling good about my talk, and rejuvenated for the night.

When I came home, my 3 year old daughter, Margaret, was heading to bed and getting ready for family prayer. It was her turn to pray and she immediately went into tears, “The boy in nursery said to be reverent!” Asking her to pray bought up memories of an incident from that morning when she was asked to pray in nursery: one of the little boys had scolded her for not being “reverent.”

I held her hands and looked her in the eyes.

“Margaret, you don’t need to be reverent to pray.”

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