Heavenly Mother’s Day: Sunrise on a Yearning Female Soul

Guest post by Domestic Philosopher

Sunrise on a Yearning Female Soul


Cold bears down.

I fall upon my knees in prayer.

Enduring, hollow winds that fill these my broken bones and empty spaces.

I grieve in silence, “Father, where is my Mother?”


Minutes pass, these endless seasons.

My winter-minutes leaving me alone.

Still I pray, I pray and watch.

The signs of life and subtle embers, warmth is sure to come …

Read More

Guest Post: Absent Mother?

by Sangeeta Charan

by Astell

My 4-year-year old daughter asked at the dinner table why we don’t talk much about Mother in Heaven. Good Question. I said we should talk about her more.

Shortly after this conversation with my youngest daughter, I was reading an essay about why there are no mothers in classic fairy tales, girls’ literature, and by extension girls’ films. I disagreed with just about all of it. The typical male-dominated argument about the desirable female being center stage, free to develop on her own, for the pleasure of the male gaze. Really? Is that the best we can do? Can’t we develop the critique any further? From another perspective?

Read More

In Light


By Ash Mae.

The day the missionaries came to our house in 1988 a rainbow fell across the sky in our neighborhood on the hill.  I stood on the ledge of the bathtub and curled my fingers on the windowsill to pull my scrawny body up to see.  I could hear their voices, fresh as orange juice, through the open window.  The way I see it now, the rainbow is brighter than any rainbow I’ve seen since.  The sky more orange and small. The fresh puddles on asphalt reflect two shimmering missionaries, pressed shirts and black pants, my mom, my dad, my little white haired brother between them, and somewhere in the background, me, watching it all.  Documenting the magic, cataloguing it for some future time.  Surely they all came in to eat dinner then, and I reached up on tiptoes and pulled down my best dress, because I always did when the missionaries came, and we must have all celebrated my mom. After so long, she’d decided to be baptized.

Read More

Terry Tempest Williams’ Mother and Poll about Mothers

Terry Tempest Williams’ Mother and Poll about Mothers
Enjoy this podcast, and take our poll!

Terry Tempest Williams on her mother’s mystifying bequest

Source: whyy.org

Twenty-five years ago, TERRY TEMPEST WILLIAMS’ mother died of ovarian cancer, and she left Terry 54 journals, one for each year of her life. Later, when Terry went to read them, longing to hear her mother’s voice again, she found that each one was blank. In her book, “When Women Were Birds: Fifty-Four Variations on Voice,” Williams meditates on why her mother might have left the journals unfilled. What did that signify to her mother? What was her mother telling her?

Listen to the podcast here.

Read More

The Long-Distance Family Phenomenon

Living far away from my family isn’t as bad anymore. It used to tear me apart inside each time I’d hear of this sibling’s latest concert and that niece’s recent cuteness, the dinner everyone had together for someone’s birthday, or the trip to Island Park for a weekend at the cabin. It still hurts, but it’s bearable. On the other hand, it’s nice to have that grand trip to look forward to, where my husband, children, and I are the guest stars for a week or so.

But something inside me feels that this isn’t right. I worry that I’m missing out—losing time that could be spent getting to know my mother better (and my sister for that matter). I know her well as “mother.” It’s only been recently that I’ve felt that perhaps I only know a small part of my mom. As I slowly grow into the role of mother, I began to realize here and there the ways I don’t yet know my mother.

Things that don’t help the matter: 1) I’m not a great phone person. I would rather be there, in person, and phone conversations sometimes frustrate me. Not always, but they are really not my thing. I know plenty of women who love a good chat on the phone, but I’m not one of them. 2) When we do make a trip to visit everyone, it’s just that. We are visiting everyone (parents, siblings, cousins and friends) at once. And there’s not much time to REALLY talk. And we are busy, doing this or that. We sometimes just don’t have the right set-up during those visits to bring up and delve into the life topics—to bring out our inner selves. 3) We are kind of a private family. My mother doesn’t talk a lot about herself (I heard most of the stories I know of her childhood from my aunt). But I don’t believe it’s because she doesn’t want me to know that part of her. 4) Maybe I’m shy about it too. It’s not only with my mother that I feel the impatient longing to know someone better but don’t know how to go about it without being completely awkward. I wonder, if my mother and I were forced into a situation where we had to talk about real stuff, what would eventually be said?

My mother did the long-distance relationship with her own mother. Growing up, I lived about 460 miles away from my maternal grandma. And, if I remember correctly, we might have visited her in Oregon once a year. I’m not even sure I know how my mom dealt with the distance? Did they write back and forth frequently? Or talk on the phone?

Do you live near your parents and/or siblings? If not, do you feel sad about it? And how do you keep close despite long-distances?

{Image of my mother in college.}

Read More