“And the foolish said unto the wise, Give us of your hand sanitizer”: Likening the scriptures unto ourselves during the COVID-19 pandemic #CopingWithCOVID19

We are taught to “liken the scriptures” unto ourselves.  In that spirit, I have adapted some favorite scripture passages to our present circumstances as we cope with a worldwide pandemic.

And at midnight there was a cry made, Behold, the bridegroom cometh; go ye out to meet him. Then all those virgins arose, and [sanitized their hands]. And the foolish said unto the wise, Give us of your [hand sanitizer]; for our [Purell dispensers] are gone out. But the wise answered, saying, Not so; lest there be not enough for us and you: but go ye rather to them that sell, and buy for yourselves. [And then they laughed and added, Good luck with that!]

-Matthew 25: 6-9

Hear therefore, O Israel, and observe to do it; that it may be well with thee, and that ye may increase mightily, as the Lord God of thy fathers hath promised thee, in the land that floweth with milk and honey [and toilet paper].

-Deuteronomy 6:3

Say unto them, Thus saith the Lord God; Behold, I will take the stick of Joseph, which is in the hand of Ephraim [and carries his germs], and the tribes of Israel his fellows [with all  of their germs], and will put them with him, even with the stick of Judah [which he coughed on], and make them one stick, and they shall be one in mine hand [so I will wash it with a Lysol wipe before I use it].

-Ezekiel 37:19

And I also cast my eyes round about, and beheld, on the other side of the river of water, a great and spacious building; and it stood as it were in the air, high above the earth.  And it was [not] filled with people, [because they were working from home].

-1 Nephi 8:26-27

And she brought forth her firstborn son, and wrapped him in swaddling clothes, and laid him in a manger; because there was [lots of ] room for them in the [empty] inn [but nonessential travel was banned]. And there were in the same country shepherds abiding in the field, keeping watch over their flock by night [while maintaining a safe 6 feet of distance from each other].

-Luke 2: 7-8

To every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven: A time to be born, and a time to die; a time to plant, and a time to pluck up that which is planted; A time to kill, and a time to heal; a time to break down, and a time to build up; A time to weep, and a time to laugh; a time to mourn, and a time to dance; A time to cast away stones, and a time to gather stones together; a time to embrace, and a time to refrain from embracing; [And right now is that last one, so try smiling and waving instead.]

-Ecclesiastes 3:1-5

During a Salt Lake City earthquake in the midst of the coronavirus pandemic, Moroni discarded his trump and raised his fist like Rosie the Riveter. “We can do it!”

And I saw another angel fly in the midst of heaven, [discarding his trumpet to raise his fist like Rosie the Riveter], Saying with a loud voice, [We can do it!]

-Revelation 14:6-7

April Young Bennett

April Young Bennett is the author of the Ask a Suffragist book series and host of the Religious Feminism Podcast. Learn more about April at aprilyoungb.com.

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4 Responses

  1. Allison says:

    Love those – made me laugh out loud! 😆

  2. Em says:

    I love it! Except the hand sanitizer one. I always thought those virgins were being stingy and I still do. I am going to donate my hand sanitizer to our hospital as they’re urgently requesting anything we can give. I stay in my house all day every day and can wash my hands after going to the mailbox. So take my sanitizer! You need it more!

  1. April 5, 2020

    […] As we embark in this shared journey, Exponent bloggers and our guests have been writing about their experiences, offering practical advice for life in quarantine, insights about how to deal with the physical and emotional toll, discussing the implications of these unique circumstances for policy and culture, and lightening the mood with humor. […]

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