The Great Divorce
My parents are divorced.
They have been for a long time.
I spend weekends with my father
But all through the week I am cared for by my mom.
When I was younger I used to go to my dad’s house
Every morning too.
He taught me how to be kind,
How to love others, and he reminded me
Over and over again how much he loves me.
But there were lies too.
Isn’t that how divorce works sometimes?
My brothers told me not to talk about mom.
Every time I was at dad’s house
Mom got the silent treatment.
As I get older my relationship with my mom gets better.
I talk to her every day
And she leaves little notes for me hidden all over
Reminding me how much she loves me too.
We go for walks in the woods
And just like that song I learned so long ago at dad’s
“All flowers remind me of her.”
My sisters are teaching me more
About mom’s side of the family,
How she was once held in great esteem.
They taught me about her persecution
And how my siblings who stood up for her
Why does divorce have to be so messy?
What drove my parents apart?
Is healing possible for my family?
When I go visit my dad
He assures me of mother’s place.
He says he loves her,
But he doesn’t seem to make the effort to get to know her.
He promised me this year
That he would support me more
That the things I learned at mom’s each week
And my weekend visit
Would strengthen my weekday life.
But I feel so betrayed.
The promise feels hollow.
He still will not speak of her.
Mom gives me hope.
She reminds me that
Love is a powerful source and can heal all wounds.
She assures me that this separation imposed on her
Will not last forever.
I realize I don’t have to choose
Between one parent or the other.
And I don’t have to apologize for or hide
The relationships I build.
I will take what’s good from my dad
And let it join my mother’s unconditional love.
Limitless, boundless, inclusive love.